If you want to know how to make someone obsessed with you, the honest answer starts by redefining the goal, because the version of “obsessed” worth having is not control at all. It is becoming so genuinely magnetic, so memorable, and so aligned with who you actually are that someone cannot stop thinking about you of their own free will. That is real, it lasts, and it can be built and, when appropriate, gently supported with spiritual work. What it is not, and what I will not help anyone build, is a person whose will has been overridden until they can no longer tell the difference between love and compulsion. Those are two different requests, and only one of them belongs in this guide.

I am Baba Ali. I am a Senegalese spiritual practitioner, trained from childhood by my grandmother in the Serer and Wolof traditions of ancestral love magic, and I have guided more than 5,000 clients across the United States toward reunion and connection over 30-plus years, with a 95% success rate. In three decades of this work, the request behind “make someone obsessed with me” has crossed my desk more times than almost any other phrase, and it means something different nearly every time someone says it. This guide is my attempt to sort out what people actually mean, what is healthy to pursue, what is not, and where I draw a line I do not cross regardless of how the request is worded.

What People Actually Mean When They Say This

When a client says “I want to make them obsessed with me,” I have learned not to take the sentence at face value and instead ask what is underneath it. Nine times out of ten, once we talk it through, what they actually want is simpler and far more reasonable than the word “obsessed” suggests: they want to be unforgettable. They want the person to think about them during an ordinary Tuesday, to feel a pull toward them that outlasts a first date, to matter in a way that a few pleasant conversations usually do not produce on their own.

That is a completely different ask than controlling someone’s mind, and it deserves to be treated differently. Wanting to be memorable, wanting your presence to linger, wanting someone to choose you again and again because being around you feels good, none of that requires bending anyone’s will. It requires becoming genuinely worth remembering, and then, if the interest is real, supporting that connection so it has room to deepen rather than fade the way early attraction so often does under distance, distraction, or a bad first few weeks.

The remaining one time out of ten is a different conversation entirely, and I have that conversation carefully. Some clients arrive genuinely wanting control: to make someone who has shown no interest, or who has actively said no, want them anyway. I address that directly later in this guide, because pretending it never comes up would be dishonest, and dishonesty is not something I practice in this work or anywhere else.

Healthy Devotion vs. Unhealthy Obsession: The Real Difference

The word “obsessed” is doing a lot of work in casual conversation these days, and most of the time it is used loosely to mean something warm: “I’m obsessed with this song,” “I’m obsessed with you.” Real, healthy devotion between two people looks a lot like that. It is intense, yes. It can feel consuming in the early stages, the way any strong new feeling does. But it leaves the other person’s judgment intact. They can still see your flaws, still disagree with you, still choose, on any given day, to walk away, and they stay anyway because they want to.

Unhealthy obsession is a different animal entirely, and the difference is not intensity, it is agency. In unhealthy obsession, the person’s ability to evaluate the relationship clearly has been compromised, whether by manipulation, isolation, dependency, or an attempt to override their will directly. They stay not because they freely choose to but because some part of their normal judgment has been disabled. That is not love with the volume turned up. It is control wearing love’s clothing, and it tends to collapse eventually into resentment, fear, or worse, once the person underneath starts to resurface.

I ask every client considering this kind of work one question that tends to clarify things fast: if this person had every option in the world and full clarity of mind, would they still choose you? If the honest answer is yes, then what you are building is healthy devotion, and I am glad to support it. If the honest answer is “I don’t think so, which is why I want the spiritual work to force it,” that is where I stop and have a harder conversation, because that request is not attraction work anymore. It is an attempt to substitute a working for a genuine yes, and that substitution is exactly what my tradition and my own ethics will not permit.

Six Practices That Build Real, Lasting Magnetism

Before any spiritual work enters the picture, there is a great deal you can build with your own hands, so to speak. These are the practical, non-spiritual practices I give every client who wants to become genuinely unforgettable to someone. None of them are tricks. All of them work because they change who you actually are in the room, not just how you appear for an evening.

How Spiritual Work Amplifies Existing Interest, Ethically

Once the practical foundation above is genuinely in place, and once there is real, mutual interest to build on, spiritual work has a specific and limited role. It clears the client’s own energetic blocks, insecurity, past hurt, a guarded aura, that quietly undercut the charisma-building work described above. It brightens presence so that the qualities a client has already developed come through more clearly rather than getting muffled by nerves or self-doubt. And where a genuine, mutual connection already exists, it can strengthen and stabilize the bond so it grows more steadily rather than stalling out after a promising start.

What it does not do, and what I will never claim it does, is create interest from nothing or override a person’s own judgment about who they want to be with. If a client wants a working aimed at a person who has shown no real interest at all, or who has directly said no, I decline that request outright. This is not a matter of style or preference in how I practice. It is the line the entire tradition I was trained in is built around: love magic amplifies and clears the path for what is real, it does not manufacture what is not there.

In practice, this means the ritual work I perform for attraction and devotion cases looks specifically at what already exists between two people and works to open, strengthen, and stabilize it. It begins with a cleansing of the client’s own field to remove the self-doubt and old hurt that dampen natural magnetism, moves into a working that opens and steadies the existing connection, and closes with a sealing that protects the progress as it settles over the following days. I do not charge a fee for the spell itself. Clients cover the cost of ritual materials only, and that cost is fully refunded if the working does not bring results. The ritual itself is completed within three to seven days.

Warning Signs a Request Has Crossed a Line

I have learned to recognize the specific patterns in a request that tell me it has moved from attraction work into something I will not do, and I lay them out here plainly because I would rather be transparent about my boundaries than have a client discover them mid-consultation feeling judged. None of these are automatic disqualifiers on their own; together, or stated directly, they change the nature of what is being asked.

When I hear language like this in a consultation, I say so directly, and I explain why I will not take the work as described. Most clients, once we talk it through, recognize they were speaking from hurt or fear rather than describing what they actually want, and the conversation shifts naturally toward the healthier version of the request. Some do not, and in those cases I decline the work entirely. That has cost me business over 30 years. It has never cost me a night’s sleep.

You cannot chain the wind and call it loyal. Let it choose to stay, and it will stay longer than any chain could hold it. — Senegalese Proverb

What Happens When There Was No Interest to Begin With

Clients sometimes ask me, sometimes hopefully and sometimes almost testing me, what happens if we do this work on someone who genuinely was not interested at all before we started. The honest answer, consistent with everything else in this guide, is that it usually does not work, and when I say “usually” I mean it plainly, not as a hedge. Free will is not a marketing phrase in my tradition. It is a structural principle of how the work actually functions.

What I have observed across thousands of cases is a consistent pattern: when there is some real basis for interest, a spark that already exists, a connection that has simply stalled or gone quiet, spiritual work reliably helps it open and strengthen. When there is no basis at all, the working tends to produce very little, sometimes nothing measurable, and clients who insist on repeating or escalating a working under those conditions do not get better results, they just spend more on materials for a result that free will was never going to allow.

I explain this to every client considering devotion or attraction work aimed at a specific person, because I would rather lose the sale than let someone believe I can manufacture a feeling that is not there. It is also, frankly, the reason I offer a full refund on materials when a working does not bring results. If the connection was never real to begin with, no amount of ritual changes that, and a client should not pay for an outcome free will was always going to prevent.

A Client Story: Marcus, 34, Chicago

I want to give one concrete example, with identifying details changed at the client’s request. Marcus came to me convinced he needed a spell to “make her obsessed,” describing a coworker he had been quietly attracted to for months. In our first consultation, when I asked what basis there was for mutual interest, he admitted, after some pushing, that they had barely spoken beyond pleasantries in the break room. There was warmth there, a friendliness on her part, but nothing that suggested real romantic interest yet, and certainly nothing to build devotion work on.

I told him plainly that I would not take on attraction work with so little foundation, and that what he actually needed first was the practical work described earlier in this guide, not a ritual. We talked through presence, through finding genuine shared ground instead of forced small talk, through letting his own interests show rather than performing a version of himself he thought she’d like. He started a woodworking hobby he had abandoned years earlier, mentioned it once in an offhand way, and she asked to see photos. That single, genuine exchange did more in one week than months of careful small talk had managed. Three months later, once real mutual interest was unmistakably there, we did a modest working to help the connection settle and deepen. They have been together for eight months as of this writing. Marcus’s case is not unusual in my practice. It is what happens most often when someone is willing to do the real work before asking for spiritual support.

If You Want to Move Forward, Here’s Where to Start

If you have read this far and you are being honest with yourself about where you stand, here is what an honest first step looks like. It is not a hard sell, and it is not a promise dressed up as a consultation. It is a real assessment of what is actually happening between you and the person you have in mind.

Before a consultation, I ask clients to reflect on three questions: is there real, observable interest already there, even in a small or early form, what have you actually done to build genuine connection so far versus how much time has gone into wanting rather than acting, and are you asking for this because you want to be truly known by this person, or because you want to control an outcome regardless of what they actually feel. That third question is the one that clarifies the most, and I ask it directly because the answer changes everything about what kind of work, if any, is appropriate.

From there, a reading tells us what is genuinely happening on the energetic level between you and the person in question: whether real interest exists to build on, what is currently blocking the connection from deepening, and what kind of support, spiritual or purely practical, would actually help. I do not recommend spiritual work to every client who asks for it. Sometimes the honest answer in consultation is “build the connection further on your own first, then come back,” and I say that plainly when it is true.

Frequently Asked Questions

A Final Word From Baba Ali

I have sat across from a great many people who wanted someone to want them back, badly enough that the wanting itself had started to feel like desperation. Almost every time, once we talked it through honestly, what they actually needed was not a spell at all, or not only a spell. It was to become, genuinely, someone worth being obsessed with, and to let a real connection grow at the pace real connections actually grow at. That is slower than most people want to hear, and it is also the only version of this that lasts once the initial spark settles into something ordinary and daily, which is where real devotion actually lives.

If you are early in building a connection, focus on the practical work in this guide before anything else. If real, mutual interest is already there and you feel it stalling or fading, spiritual support may genuinely help, and I am glad to talk it through with you honestly. What I will not do is pretend a working can replace someone’s own free choice to want you back. That choice, freely made, is worth more than any ritual could ever manufacture on its own.